Ding Dong, Xbox’ Don Mattrick is… Well, Gone — Moved to Zynga...

Ding Dong, Xbox’ Don Mattrick is… Well, Gone — Moved to Zynga Apparently. Oh.

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Not that I wish anybody harm in their careers, but Corporate America is such a backwards beast. Take the tale of one Don Mattrick—not a week ago reviled by video game enthusiasts all over the web and forced to backpedal on the very same corporate policy he strong-armed; you’d expect such a PR blunder to cost him his job.

But nope: as today’s press release from Zynga shows, Don Mattrick is actually leaving Microsoft’s lofty Redmond headquarters and is making the drive down to sunny San Francisco to head the latter company as their CEO. “Don is unique in the game business,” as stated by Zynga founder Mark Pincus in the release. “He can execute in multiple domains — hardware, software, and network.” To be unprofessional and off-the-cuff for a second, I believe Mr. Pincus forgot one more domain Mattrick excelled in, and that is the domain of complete, unapologetic smugness.

You really cannot hate Mattrick here. He won. Microsoft lost, and we—as a collective hivemind—also lost. It really takes a certain kind of person with enough savvy and cunning to survive in the corporate world, and most of us (i.e., the 99%) can’t do what Mattrick just did, and that is fall upwards. Sure, you can argue that Zynga is a sinking ship all day, but the dude’s going to be a CEO of that (supposedly) failing company, make even more money and hop out with a golden parachute when that company eventually shuts down. In other words, he’s pulling a Jason Rubin.

As for Microsoft, apparently the games division will be headed temporarily by CEO Steve Ballmer. All’s I can say is… Please make this guy permanent head of the games division (ref: above video).